[ hasn't he seen this before? over and over again, people with the seed of contempt in their hearts that turned it into a blaze of disruption. ]
Really? It just looks like you're reacting to something and thinking you have control over what you're becoming.
[ like a neatly timed kneejerk. she's just refined the process. ]
The answer isn't being alone.
[ even if Akechi thought it was at that time. it was better to push away people and act on his own, but in the end it had been his downfall. at that time, no matter how far Ren tried to reach, he couldn't catch Akechi.
he might be able to catch Catra, even if she hates him for a while. ]
[ Ren's answer only infuriates her even more. She looks-- downright feral.
As if she wants to be alone!
She doesn't. She desperately doesn't. She wants-- she wants Adora, and Scorpia, and everyone, all by her side. But she can't have that, because they all leave her. One by one. When they find out what Catra's really like, eventually, one way or another-- they all leave. ]
Oh yeah? What, you're gonna be friends with me when I've finished my take over of Etheria? You're really gonna sit down to dinner with a war criminal? Huh?
[ Akechi had lifted a gun and put it to his head and pulled the trigger. well, it wasn't him, but Akechi certainly thought it was him. at that time, he had been caught up in something so deep that he couldn't see a way out. he had to see it through. ]
Is that what you're going to do after you take over? Dinner?
It's not the first thing that comes to mind for world-conquering ambitions.
[ Shido had something specific: he would drown out all else and turn the world into nothing to appease his own selfishness. while Catra certainly talked big, she was no Shido. ]
Yeah, I'll meet you for dinner.
[ perhaps try to work out a way to steal her heart, but certainly not turn that down. ]
[ between both Shido and Yaldabaoth, Catra's been beat. it's too late for her to try to rearrange her former intentions into something more vile, because he already knew that it was a lie. ]
I spent a year stealing hearts. [ he keeps his dark eyes fixed on her, tilting down his glasses. ] Seeking out distorted desires and making people confess their crimes.
[ Catra blinks for a minute, and then she laughs-- meanly. But she leans into his space then, up close and personal. ]
Oh. Haha. You want to know my crimes? You don't have to do anything special. I'll admit them all freely. Go on. It's not a secret or anything. Why don't you just ask?
[ It's telling, perhaps, that she seems herself in that statement as the rotten adult, and not the person being used. ]
[ yeah, it is. strange—it isn't something that he expected. did she even know that she was being used? taken advantage of? Adora seemed to place it. Catra wasn't the only person who mentioned Shadow Weaver. ]
Sure, I'll listen. Did you want to do it here, or did you want to get food first?
[ Catra holds his gaze with a hostile expression for a few more beats before she finally breaks and looks away. One hand goes up to her the back of her hair unconsciously, as if to smooth it down. ]
[ he doesn't back down in staring at her back—there's a resistance in his dark eyes, deliberate over the rim of his glasses. he keeps it hidden behind them, as if he's trying to mask his intensity. when it comes out, he doesn't stop it.
Catra breaks away and he tilts his head, giving it a shake as if he's letting go of the tension. ]
[ Catra waits for Ren to lead and then follows along behind him. Though perhaps "stalks" along behind him would be more accurate. There's an intensity to her gaze and her walk that never used to be there. It's unsettling enough that people instinctively move out of their way as they make their way through the city. She doesn't yield for anyone.
When they get there, Catra orders her food with a bark and gets it in a to go box. Even fresh food doesn't seem to be as appealing to her as it once was. She turns back to Ren with a frown once he has his food in hand too. ]
... I don't want to eat here. There's too many people.
[ Her tail does a short and aborted flick unconsciously behind her. ]
[ the differences are easy to see—gone is the wonder and playfulness to her bite. it's replaced with a sort of paranoia that may be the succession of her pain, or rather, what he feels may be her pain. he can't be entirely sure, only that she doesn't seem to see it that way.
Ren pays without a question, then makes a motion with her hand for her to follow. there's a park around the corner, and no one's really milling about at this hour. when he takes a seat on one of the benches, it's definitely more quiet. ]
[ Catra just holds her food in her hands, not eating it. She frowns. Silence drops between them.
It's easy to talk about those things in the heat of the moment. When she's angry, lashing out, wanting to hurt someone the way she's hurting.
It's hard to talk about it when the tension has left the air, when they're sitting on a park bench peacefully and holding food. Catra stares resolutely at the pita in her hands like it holds the answer to the mysteries of the universe. Finally-- ]
... I'm leading the Horde now, Fluffy. That means I'm the head of the military. I call all the shots. We're at war, and the Horde has never played fair. ... What do you think. You're a smart guy. Figure it out.
[ it is hard to talk this way, when Catra isn't riled up trying to push him away. he puts some bread in his mouth.
he gets it: why she needed to do that. Akechi did the same thing. he took up arms and rose up to meet Ren as a rival on an opposing side. to do that, Catra needed to meet Adora resource for resource. ]
Why are you looking at me like I know? Do I look like the kind of person who pays attention to every little coming and going of all the random people who end up here to you?
![[personal profile]](https://www.dreamwidth.org/img/silk/identity/user.png){kind=small}
no subject
Date: 2020-08-18 05:44 pm (UTC)I don't let anybody define me other than me.
no subject
Date: 2020-08-22 02:40 pm (UTC)Really? It just looks like you're reacting to something and thinking you have control over what you're becoming.
[ like a neatly timed kneejerk. she's just refined the process. ]
The answer isn't being alone.
[ even if Akechi thought it was at that time. it was better to push away people and act on his own, but in the end it had been his downfall. at that time, no matter how far Ren tried to reach, he couldn't catch Akechi.
he might be able to catch Catra, even if she hates him for a while. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-22 04:52 pm (UTC)As if she wants to be alone!
She doesn't. She desperately doesn't. She wants-- she wants Adora, and Scorpia, and everyone, all by her side. But she can't have that, because they all leave her. One by one. When they find out what Catra's really like, eventually, one way or another-- they all leave. ]
Oh yeah? What, you're gonna be friends with me when I've finished my take over of Etheria? You're really gonna sit down to dinner with a war criminal? Huh?
no subject
Date: 2020-08-23 03:59 pm (UTC)Is that what you're going to do after you take over? Dinner?
no subject
Date: 2020-08-23 04:14 pm (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-08-24 05:01 pm (UTC)[ Shido had something specific: he would drown out all else and turn the world into nothing to appease his own selfishness. while Catra certainly talked big, she was no Shido. ]
Yeah, I'll meet you for dinner.
[ perhaps try to work out a way to steal her heart, but certainly not turn that down. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-25 10:50 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-08-25 02:07 pm (UTC)I spent a year stealing hearts. [ he keeps his dark eyes fixed on her, tilting down his glasses. ] Seeking out distorted desires and making people confess their crimes.
...
Especially rotten adults who used people.
no subject
Date: 2020-08-25 04:12 pm (UTC)Oh. Haha. You want to know my crimes? You don't have to do anything special. I'll admit them all freely. Go on. It's not a secret or anything. Why don't you just ask?
[ It's telling, perhaps, that she seems herself in that statement as the rotten adult, and not the person being used. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-25 07:39 pm (UTC)Sure, I'll listen. Did you want to do it here, or did you want to get food first?
[ just call him impossible. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-26 03:29 pm (UTC)[ Catra seems taken aback. This isn't-- the reaction she's used to. ]
What is wrong with you. What part of all that did you not get?
no subject
Date: 2020-08-27 01:30 pm (UTC)It's the part I do get.
[ there's a curt shake of his head. ]
How about it?
no subject
Date: 2020-08-27 01:46 pm (UTC)... Fine. Whatever. But you're paying.
no subject
Date: 2020-08-28 01:57 am (UTC)Catra breaks away and he tilts his head, giving it a shake as if he's letting go of the tension. ]
Come on.
[ there's a pita place not far. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-28 02:28 am (UTC)When they get there, Catra orders her food with a bark and gets it in a to go box. Even fresh food doesn't seem to be as appealing to her as it once was. She turns back to Ren with a frown once he has his food in hand too. ]
... I don't want to eat here. There's too many people.
[ Her tail does a short and aborted flick unconsciously behind her. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-28 05:03 pm (UTC)Ren pays without a question, then makes a motion with her hand for her to follow. there's a park around the corner, and no one's really milling about at this hour. when he takes a seat on one of the benches, it's definitely more quiet. ]
Okay. What are your crimes?
[ he's tearing at a little bit of bread. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-08-30 02:45 am (UTC)It's easy to talk about those things in the heat of the moment. When she's angry, lashing out, wanting to hurt someone the way she's hurting.
It's hard to talk about it when the tension has left the air, when they're sitting on a park bench peacefully and holding food. Catra stares resolutely at the pita in her hands like it holds the answer to the mysteries of the universe. Finally-- ]
... I'm leading the Horde now, Fluffy. That means I'm the head of the military. I call all the shots. We're at war, and the Horde has never played fair. ... What do you think. You're a smart guy. Figure it out.
no subject
Date: 2020-09-01 10:35 pm (UTC)he gets it: why she needed to do that. Akechi did the same thing. he took up arms and rose up to meet Ren as a rival on an opposing side. to do that, Catra needed to meet Adora resource for resource. ]
You got there fast.
no subject
Date: 2020-09-03 04:12 pm (UTC)... It's been over a year, for me.
Besides. I was already practically running the show anyway. Before. It was easy enough once I figured out how.
no subject
Date: 2020-09-07 05:31 pm (UTC)[ it had been a year for him, well—sort of. another year for him? a year that was the same, with memories wedged in where they should be. ]
Did you come back recently?
no subject
Date: 2020-09-08 02:39 am (UTC)[ She doesn't seem to want to elaborate any further than that. ]
... You don't look any different, though. You still look... the same.
no subject
Date: 2020-09-08 02:51 am (UTC)[ he didn't know that looking different was a necessity!! also, well, he technically left and came back at the same time. ]
no subject
Date: 2020-09-08 04:23 am (UTC)no subject
Date: 2020-09-08 04:06 pm (UTC)Is everyone usually gone for a year?
no subject
Date: 2020-09-08 04:15 pm (UTC)(no subject)
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